Ah, June. What a beautiful month. By now you’ve had time to pack away the jackets, bask in the sunlight, and grow comfortable in the knowledge that your allergies won’t get much worse than this.
Which, thank goodness because if it got any worse you might consider stabbing an ice pick up your nose just to relieve the sinus pressure. And if your eyes itched anymore than they do now, you might just pluck them out and sell them to the black market for human body parts. At least then you would have the money to afford your drug habit. You know, the one where you have to buy so many boxes of Claritin, Allegra, and Zyrtec that the lady at Walmart gives you suspicious looks. She just knows your cooking up a batch of that newfangled drug the kids are taking these days. What’s it called, again? Zilch? Toots? Headbangers? Something like that; she’s sure of it. And frankly, you’re pounding so many combinations of allergy medicine with a daily overdose of DayQuil that you might as well be snorting whatever a methdealer has been scraping off his hotplate. It’s all mixing into deadly chemical cocktails inside your bloodstream anyway, all in an effort to just make those darn histamines play nice with the pollen that coats every surface for 9 months out of the year.
And what’s with those histamines, anyway? What made them so darn inflammatory? I mean, one grain of pollen enters your nose and suddenly they’re all offended and create a massive roadblock of snot to spite everyone. Good grief, just cool it histamines! We get it; you’re tough stuff. This is your turf and you won’t let no stinkin’ pollens inside your neighborhood. But seriously, just play nice. At least at night, so I can sleep for at least 2 hours straight. I’m begging you.
Sorry, where was I? Oh yes, June is such a nice month. Perfect for a random word prompt.